My Newest About Me
now here's the updated one! =]
always getting older.
My hair keeps growing,
but it's not at my shoulder.
If you watched me,
working at a store.
They might fire my ass,
because I forgot to mop the floor.
Now I'm a freshman,
at Uconn this year.
I'm going to study Middle Eastern Studies,
to work for the government, so get it clear.
I'm a nerd that shops at H-C-O,
I still feel weird when they stare as I go.
I like to buy the shirts with phrases to read,
but my Spain's "Puta" is the one they plead.
My age, my age, I'm far,
from what you've probably seen!
I don't do drugs, I'm a virgin,
and I'm almost 19!
Minors beware, I won't buy you drags,
Playgirl purchases are prohibited for all you silly fags
Personally, I like eskimo kisses,
but I'm not too fond about snow.
I like cuddling inside on love seats,
and butterfly kisses make my juices flow.
For me, sex talk is so health class,
and as far as I am aware - I did pass.
Abstinence grows the heart fonder,
so don't ask me about babies.
They'll spend over millions of dollars -
so there arn't any maybes!
My values and ambitions,
are the way to life,
If I want to get married,
I won't marry a trashy hoe for a wife.
Now you know me,
so let's be friends.
P.s.
I'm not Barney,
I don't like pretends.

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